There are so many starts in life. Walk up a tough flight of stairs and before you have a chance to take a deep breath, there’s another before you.
It’s scary to look at a new experience and know that it’s going to be tough. It makes you feel like a part of you has to be numb just in case something real prickly comes your way.
I do worry about new starts quite a bit. One is coming my way real soon. But I’ve grown to learn that a fearful new start is the best kind. It means new learning and new opportunities. It brings new experiences and takes me out of my comfort zone.
I remember reading Albert Camus’es- ‘The Myth Of Sisyphus.’ At that time it felt absurd to be scared of new beginning because what’s the use really? We’ll all die and TBH each path has its own merit. To an extent I do believe that which is why I’m excited and nervous. But our experiences are so similar to this story. The story of Sisyphus cursed to roll the boulder up the hill again and again. His fate is just like us, constantly rolling a boulder up a mountain, it rolls back down, then back to the tough part. So it’s up to us really to see meaning/beauty/worth in this experience. Otherwise, it’s just worthless drudgery.
I would definitely suggest reading the Myth Of Sisyphus by Albert Camus. Even if you don’t relate its meaning to this, it works so wonderfully in other contexts. This is a quote from it that I absolutely adore.
As for me, as much as I can’t wait for the new beginning, I am pretty nervous for that next flight of stairs. Atleast I’ve had a moment to catch my breath so far.
Photo credits: Unsplash- Jukan Tateisi